I hate Track point devices. This is a disaster. Nothing can replace a Mouse (perhaps with the exception of a motion detector glove). Apart from the feel of something sufficiently large and round under your palm, the control and usability of the Mouse are vastly greater than a frickin Track point or Sensor Pad!

Anyways, as you can see I am not loving certain things about my laptop.

It’s been awhile since I
Last blogged on this site
It’s been a awhile since I first started,
It’s been awhile since I
Woke up in the morn,
It’s been awhile since I last ate

Sudden bout of plagiaristic lyrical spewage (is that a real word?). Was in office till 2 a.m. last night. I am shattered for life (well not really, but that does sound dramatic doesn’t it?). Anyways, came into office a bit late and have been lazing about since.

Saturday’s BBQ was good. I actually overate and spent the rest of the night waddling about, trying to let things settle. Which was not easy. What with the BaldAussie admiring Big Fat Mama’s buttocks, and BFM waxing eloquent about the virtues of his buttocks and their curly hair, and then a certain someone insisting that she was a transvestite and spelling banana (B-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-N-A you get the idea right), and of course good old “smiley” puking away. I was in stitches. After leaving the party somewhat early in the morning, I proceed to go to sleep and decided to wake up at a decent time, which was 2 in the afternoon.

Car has been fixed. I have been ripping it along the roadways. That thing is too easy to drive, might fall asleep and die.

I have the urge write a long spewage (there’s that word again) on Formula 1 and those that dare blaspheme and incur the wrath of Michealus Schumacherus! I shall do so later. The urge has passed.

There should be a law against false advertising. Hang on, there IS one isn’t there? Well I want to use it against a movie. The movie in question is The Good Girl, starring Jennifer Aniston and a few other also rans. MY problem is that it said “Romance, Comedy and Drama” a the back of the DVD, and in truth it was more like snore, yawn, yawn, did I mention yawn. Ok there were a coupla scenes with sex, but nothing new about JA that you won’t see in a porn site; besides this was offset by a TOTALLY UNNECESSARY male full frontal nudity scene. GROSS. VOMIT. PUKE. BARF. The movie should be banned just for that. But seriously, for a comedy it was about as funny as watching paint dry. And being the stupid optimist that I am, I actually watched the whole movie till the end in the hope that there would be some mega punch line, which would make the whole thing hilarious. I’m still waiting. Even Loki and Evenstar (who watched the movie with me) agreed that it was dumb. So if you haven’t gotten it by now………..Don’t watch the stupid movie! It sucks ass!

Synopsis of the stooopid thing:
Justine (Jennifer Aniston) is THE GOOD GIRL. Thirty years old and working in a Texas discount store, she is dissatisfied by her routine and disgusted by her lazy, pot-smoking husband. Her life is nearly at a standstill, until she suddenly notices Holden (Jake Gyllenhaal) a few cash registers away. He is young and seemingly as disaffected as she, and together the two forge a passionate connection destined to shatter everything.

In other news production work for Romeo & Juliet are well under way. This will probably be the biggest ever production by Stage Light & Magic to date. It’s going to be the next biggest thing since sliced bread. One big badass mother of show. Only thing is you’ll have to wait till next October to see it, October 2004 that is. With what’s being planned, it’s going to take a whole year to get on the boards. So keep your fingers crossed.

Feeling strangely euphoric and tired. I think I had a good dream, but for the life of me I can’t remember what it was. And wonder of wonders, I woke up early too, after sleeping late (1.30), which leads me to believe the good dream theory is true.

Yesterday was Roady boi’s birthday. Boi is getting older but still shows no sign of aging. Maybe the secret is in having a shaved head. I must try this out. And in keeping with his proud tradition Pedro expounded his theory of Consistency at this momentous occasion, which was along the lines of his Balance/Equilibrium theory (utter cock). Of course we wasted no time in …..”speedily” dismantling the “theory”, and proceeded to have a good laugh about it (as usual).

Obsessed with F1 news these days. Keep seeing a scarlet (yes I know Spike that it is not scarlet but another shade of red which I can’t remember right now) Ferrari everywhere. Hallucinating I think (duh). This is like the time I kept seeing a black cat in Spike’s room at his old house. Strangely this was about the time when Matrix was released (was it?). Remember the Déjà vu cat? I see nothing but a mess now in his room (which is the same as his old room, except this one has no cat).
I also hear TNL Lite without the aid of a radio. You may say that I probably am 2 lettuce leaves short of a club sandwich, but trust me on this one. My tinny little pc speakers at work pick up TNL Lite. I just have to power the buggers up (not even connect it to the laptop) and voila! I have radio. Now if I could just figure out how to get free pizza………

Yesterday was AWESOME! Schumi RULES! Ferrari Rules! I know I know, I sound like some hormone overfilled teenager. But you have no idea what it was like to see Ferrari back in the lead dominating all the way through. In case you’re wondering this is F1 that I’m talking about. Anyways, the next coupla races should be pretty amazing.

Saturday……went to Cas, after months of Blue-ing. Geez, that place sucks. Cas that is. I don’t mean to sound elitist but, seriously, the class of people at Cas is pretty bad. Which is made worse when you consider the number of pro’s at the place. Russians galore, few Chinesey creatures and plenty of people to feel them up too. Either these guys have no integrity or they are utterly desperate or they’re complete and utter losers; I’m inclined to think that it’s all 3 of those reasons. You have to be or you can’t parade around in public with a Russian prostitute sprawled all over you. Sad.

In other news, this is the conversation that took place between the great MalFurion Pedro De La Rosa and me, when he was over ½ an hour late to pick me up.
“Pedro, where are you?”
“errr….I forgot to pump petrol so I came to pump petrol”
“ok, so where are you?”
“at the petrol shed”
“……………no you ……WHERE are you?)
“ah, in Maradana”

@#*%£^##@#$ …….although nothing beats this one (again featuring the great MalFurion) with Spike sometime back….

“Pedro, where are you?”
“errr…..pumping petrol”
“ok, where are you pumping petrol?”
“into the car”
“…….@#*%£^##@#$ WHERE are you pumping petrol?”
“ah, at Laugfs”

Never a dull moment with him around :)

“To blog or not to blog?” The question I pondered today. In the end, as you can see, I’ did. But what shall I write about?
I finally finished the new (almost) Harry Potter book. Yes I know, most of you read that months ago. But consider, I have been able to read it only when I go to the loo. And in retrospect, it’s appropriate loo material, i.e.: - it’s full shit. The book reminds me of the essays I used to write in school, like cereal expanding in milk. Very little matter, lots of words. JKR is so commercial it’s sickening. Perhaps that is only surpassed by the fact that she is so talentless when it comes to writing long books/sequels. I say long because the first HP book was quite alright. But this new one just rambles on and on about Harry’s adolescence and his various issues blah blah blah. It’s very….how shall I put it……..female. Which is very true because all the women who read it really like it, and all the guys think it sucks. (This could be another Oprah plot!) Then of course the bit about the spells and the vanquishing the evil forces etc, is all done with in a matter of 20-30 pages or less and all his pms……sorry…….”adolescent” problems are sorted out in a 3 page conversation with Mumblebore. And people paid 1600/= to buy this. The herd/masses deserve to be taken for rides like this, just because they are capable of swallowing this shit. Never ceases to amaze me.

Good gig by Kreb’s Cycle on Tuesday night. Kakkutta’s Birthday, and the man was on fire. Played some good shit, great crowd and it went on till 3 or so in the morning. I slept till 2 the next day, woke up, ate, slept again. Lovely holiday.

BTW, my Nokia 7250 phone is for sale. Yes I know I sold my 7650 only 3 weeks ago and got this, but now I have my sights set on another one. So let me know if any of you want it. Make an offer don’t be scared.

Ah, a long sojourn from blogging. Was determined not make this a habit, well, not that there was anything much to write about. I’m not a daily blogger, not into this big sharing thing instigated by “god’s gift mankind” (the Americans). An example that is best illustrated by the joke “How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb? Five. One to change the bulb, and the other Four to share the experience”. Honestly I don’t get it and I think it’s a plot headed by Oprah Winfrey to turn all men into subservient Oestrogen flooded snivelling idiots. Seriously that woman needs to be put down, and I mean in the shoot-the-dog kinda put down.

I want to start a men’s rights, pro men movement/talk show here. I wonder how many people would join it and how many would think it’s gay. Actually the latter seems to be a more prominent possibility and thus the idea is abandoned, left to dwindle away, vanish into nothingness, fade………well you get the idea. But then if I get sufficient feedback I think the movement should be started.

The other day I was listening to this radio DJ on the affirmative station. And the thought occurred to me………You have to be born a special kind knob to be a radio DJ. Think about it,
1. You have to talk drivel
2. You have to make it sound fascinating
3. You have to have the most fake accent possible (a little more refined than the MC Cool Dudes perhaps)
4. You have to be able to repeat commercial and outdated catch phrases like “Here’s something brand spanking new”
In retrospect they’re not just knobs, they’re talented at being knobs. Which brings about the question “Are knobs born or made?”, any thoughts on that?

I had to put this in. The great MalFurion Pedro De La Rosa returned a few days ago from the Goth Lands, where he was exploring the Dark Side. The Nights there are so long that you get to party “4 days a night”. Wow! And the girls in the street….are “Westernised”! Amazing! (In case you don’t get what this is all about, don’t worry ‘tis not meant for you)

Well, I better go before my boss discovers that he is inadvertently paying me to have fun. Away away away…………..whoosh (Dharma & Greg)

This following bit of code is designed by some bloke named gaydeceiver, go figure.........

Bill Gates
Circle I Limbo

Most of the Sri Lankan masses
Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

Traffic cops
Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

Rednecks
Circle IV Rolling Weights

Shock Absorber bra makers
Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

River Styx

Purple Dino's
Circle VI Buried for Eternity

River Phlegyas

Self pitying women
Circle VII Burning Sands

Tony Blair
Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

George Bush
Circle IX Frozen in Ice

Design your own hell

Ola, Habla esta espanol? No? Fine fine, I’ll stop the weak attempt at Spanish/Latin/whatever. Just trying to do something new.
Watched a cool movie yesterday, The Life of David Gale. Watch it it’s an amazing whodunit. Keeps you in suspense right till the end, awesome. In other news, Onstage sucked, sucked, sucked. Sucked like a 50-year-old toothless hooker. If you ever have the need to look up the word Sub-standard, look no further. Onstage was just that. The quality of all the contests was so low. The only people who were into it were the bands respective families, and I have a sneaky feeling they were putting up a front as well. Either way it got us so down, that the intended trip to the Blue never happened. And as to why I actually stayed there, well, it was to see Hi-Octane play. I sorta know them; and even though they won, honestly they were better LAST year when they were knocked out in the prelims. Sorry, but that’s the plain truth.
Not in the mood for this. Shall blog later – maybe.